No Fun Allowed: Difference between revisions
(3 intermediate revisions by 3 users not shown) | |||
Line 12: | Line 12: | ||
#Speaking of hats, Ian can no longer wear hats. That's animal abuse. | #Speaking of hats, Ian can no longer wear hats. That's animal abuse. | ||
#Security Officers can't use [[Vore|unsanctioned]] means of transporting prisoners. | #Security Officers can't use [[Vore|unsanctioned]] means of transporting prisoners. | ||
#[[Asset Protection]] | #[[Asset Protection]] is removed because no functional government would allow it to exist. | ||
#The [[Emergency Response Team]] can only carry tasers and rubber bullets. Actually on second thought, they don't get weapons. They're basically firefighters and paramedics. | #The [[Emergency Response Team]] can only carry tasers and rubber bullets. Actually on second thought, they don't get weapons. They're basically firefighters and paramedics. | ||
#[[Vore]] is unrealistic and therefore should be removed. | #[[Vore]] is unrealistic and therefore should be removed. | ||
#Security has all lethal weapons removed. You're basically glorified mall cops, after all. | #Security has all lethal weapons removed. You're basically glorified mall cops, after all. | ||
#In fact, just | #In fact, just replace Security with a phone to call the space police. | ||
#Engineers can't build anything without the explicit approval of the Chief Engineer, Colony Director, and Central Command. | #Engineers can't build anything without the explicit approval of the Chief Engineer, Colony Director, and Central Command. | ||
#Roboticists are not allowed to build mechs without the approval of the Research Director, Head of Security, and Central Command. | |||
#Space OSHA must review all construction projects, and they'll be here some time in 2-3 weeks. | #Space OSHA must review all construction projects, and they'll be here some time in 2-3 weeks. | ||
#Xenobiology is banned from making slimes, because nothing good ever comes of it. | #Xenobiology is banned from making slimes, because nothing good ever comes of it. | ||
# | #In fact, nobody is allowed to do their jobs without prior permission from their head of staff. | ||
#Staff are not allowed to leave their workplaces and must send regular status reports to the [[Colony Director]], this is a professional business. | #Staff are not allowed to leave their workplaces and must send regular status reports to the [[Colony Director]], this is a professional business. | ||
#Breaks are not allowed unless you've been working steady for 4 hours, in which case, you're allowed a 30 minute meal break. Otherwise, get back to work. | #Breaks are not allowed unless you've been working steady for 4 hours, in which case, you're allowed a 30 minute meal break. Otherwise, get back to work. | ||
Line 27: | Line 28: | ||
#People doing anything unrealistic in a closed room must be reported to the admins immediately, to protect the immersion of the ghost players. | #People doing anything unrealistic in a closed room must be reported to the admins immediately, to protect the immersion of the ghost players. | ||
#Ghosts are unrealistic. | #Ghosts are unrealistic. | ||
#Anyone wanting to board the tram must buy a ticket. | |||
#The ship should never be moved because it might be dangerous. | |||
#The engine should never be started because it might be dangerous. | |||
#Away teams are not allowed to leave until everyone involved has a complete set of endgame equipment and every chemical under the sun. | |||
#People on away teams are not allowed to investigate the wildlife or points of interest because they don't have better loot than the aforementioned endgame equipment. | |||
#Away missions are to be treated like a speedrun to get the content done as fast as possible. | |||
[[Category:Joke pages]] | [[Category:Joke pages]] |
Latest revision as of 10:44, 5 March 2023
Sometimes, certain rules are really just guidelines. The purpose of Vorestation is to have fun, ideally with the intended purpose that's literally in the god damn title.
Some people think that's crazy talk, so this page is dedicated to people who would rather Vorestation (and in fact, every SS13 server) give an authentic experience with all the FUN™ of a real workplace, except with none of the pay. Here's what would help make Vorestation the cold and unfeeling hard-scifi corporate experience that you want, just like your normal day job, except in space.
Also, in case it isn't obvious, this is a joke page. Anyone who takes these suggestions seriously is a fucking idiot.
MOST BEST AUTHENTIC SPACEMEN EXPERIENCE™
These are helpful suggestions submitted by players and admins on how to create MOST BEST AUTHENTIC SPACEMEN EXPERIENCE™. If you hear a helpful suggestion, add it to this list.
- Cargo will now deny all of your orders without the proper paperwork being filled out. Also the box of hats is removed.
- Speaking of hats, Ian can no longer wear hats. That's animal abuse.
- Security Officers can't use unsanctioned means of transporting prisoners.
- Asset Protection is removed because no functional government would allow it to exist.
- The Emergency Response Team can only carry tasers and rubber bullets. Actually on second thought, they don't get weapons. They're basically firefighters and paramedics.
- Vore is unrealistic and therefore should be removed.
- Security has all lethal weapons removed. You're basically glorified mall cops, after all.
- In fact, just replace Security with a phone to call the space police.
- Engineers can't build anything without the explicit approval of the Chief Engineer, Colony Director, and Central Command.
- Roboticists are not allowed to build mechs without the approval of the Research Director, Head of Security, and Central Command.
- Space OSHA must review all construction projects, and they'll be here some time in 2-3 weeks.
- Xenobiology is banned from making slimes, because nothing good ever comes of it.
- In fact, nobody is allowed to do their jobs without prior permission from their head of staff.
- Staff are not allowed to leave their workplaces and must send regular status reports to the Colony Director, this is a professional business.
- Breaks are not allowed unless you've been working steady for 4 hours, in which case, you're allowed a 30 minute meal break. Otherwise, get back to work.
- All AI laws must be reset immediately without even asking what they are, the instant the RD becomes aware of them.
- Anyone who does anything that so much as touches your job is breaking the rules. Even if it's also their job. Especially if it's also their job.
- People doing anything unrealistic in a closed room must be reported to the admins immediately, to protect the immersion of the ghost players.
- Ghosts are unrealistic.
- Anyone wanting to board the tram must buy a ticket.
- The ship should never be moved because it might be dangerous.
- The engine should never be started because it might be dangerous.
- Away teams are not allowed to leave until everyone involved has a complete set of endgame equipment and every chemical under the sun.
- People on away teams are not allowed to investigate the wildlife or points of interest because they don't have better loot than the aforementioned endgame equipment.
- Away missions are to be treated like a speedrun to get the content done as fast as possible.