Clown: Difference between revisions

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| width="150" align="center" bgcolor="{{{imagebgcolor|#cccccc}}}" |{{#if:{{{img_generic|}}}| [[File:{{{img_generic|{{{jobtitle}}}.png}}}]] | }} {{#if:{{{img|}}}| [[File:{{{img|{{{jobtitle}}}.png}}}]] | }} {{#if:{{{img|}}} | <br> | {{#if:{{{img_generic|}}} | <br> | }} }} '''[[File:Clown.png|link=Clown]]<br> Clown'''
| width="150" align="center" bgcolor="{{{imagebgcolor|#cccccc}}}" |{{#if:{{{img_generic|}}}| [[File:{{{img_generic|{{{jobtitle}}}.png}}}]] | }} {{#if:{{{img|}}}| [[File:{{{img|{{{jobtitle}}}.png}}}]] | }} {{#if:{{{img|}}} | <br> | {{#if:{{{img_generic|}}} | <br> | }} }} '''[[File:Clown.png|link=Clown]]<br> Clown'''
|'''Access:''' <s>Anywhere if you can find someone irresponsible enough to let you in</s><span> None</span><br>'''Difficulty:''' {{{difficulty|<font color="#FF00FF">HONK!</font>}}}<br>'''Supervisors:''' {{{superior|<s>The Clowncellor</s>}}} [[Head of Personnel]]<br>'''Duties:''' {{{duties|Be "Funny"}}}<br>'''<s>Guides:</s>''' '''Story:''' [[Clowns]]
|'''Access:''' <s>Anywhere if you can find someone stupid enough to let you in</s><span> Entertainment Backroom</span><br>'''Difficulty:''' {{{difficulty|<font color="#FF00FF">HONK!</font>}}}<br>'''Supervisors:''' {{{superior|<s>The Clowncellor</s>}}} [[Head of Personnel]]<br>'''Duties:''' {{{duties|Be "Funny"}}}'''Funny Operating Procedure:''' [[Standard Operating Procedure#Clown|Clown]]<br>'''<s>Guides:</s>''' '''Story:''' [[Clowns]]
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==Overview==
==Overview==
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==Clown Traditions==
==Clown Traditions==
Clowns have traditional rituals passed down even outside of the Clown Planet Institute, that, while not confirmed by actual documented data, have been passed down by word of mouth. The clown, as per nonverbal agreement, is encouraged to act <s>like they got in a motorcycle accident</s> to act in ways that would normally land an average crewmember in the [[Psychologist|Psychologist's]] office, or worse, the [[Warden|Warden's]] <s>stomach</s> office. These include, but are not limited to: hiding your identity, refusing to ever take your mask off, <s>being a shitty greytider who goes around collecting tools like its loot</s> taking things you don't really need, using said tools to [[Hacking|Hack]] into places that don't come with your job, and <s>eating the [[Head of Personnel|CRO]]</s>  playing pranks on your fellow crewmembers. Common tools of the trade include: Banana Peels, Banana Cream Pies, your trusty Bike Horn, and <s>whatever you can get your filthy grubby hands on</s> whatever tools you find <s>in maintenance</s> along the way.
Clowns have traditional rituals passed down even outside of the Clown Planet Institute, that, while not confirmed by actual documented data, have been passed down by word of mouth. The clown, as per nonverbal agreement, is encouraged to act <s>like they got in a shuttle accident</s> to act in ways that would normally land an average crewmember in the [[Psychologist|Psychologist's]] office, or worse, <s>a [[Security Officer|Security Officer's]] stomach</s> the Brig. These include, but are not limited to: hiding your identity, refusing to ever take your mask off, <s>being a shitty greytider who goes around collecting tools like its loot</s> taking things you don't really need, using said tools to [[Hacking|Hack]] into places that don't come with your job, and <s>eating the [[Head of Personnel|CRO]]</s>  playing pranks on your fellow crewmembers. Common tools of the trade include: Banana Peels, Banana Cream Pies, your trusty Bike Horn, and <s>whatever you can get your filthy grubby hands on</s> whatever tools you find <s>in maintenance</s> along the way.


<br />
<br />
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!Prank!
!Prank!
!Prank Description!
!Prank Description!
!pRaNk CoNsEqUeNcEs
!Prank Consequences!
|-
|-
|Lube in the hallway!
|Lube in the hallway!
|Just lube up some tiles and watch em fly right <s>into a gut</s> into the koi pond!
|Just lube up some tiles and watch em fly right <s>into a gut</s> into the koi pond! Banana peels are a good alternative if you run out of lube or the chemist has more than one braincell!
|Never put lube in front of an airlock or <s>you will be banned</s> security will never let you out of the brig.
|Never put lube in front of an airlock or <s>you will be banned</s> security will never let you out of the brig.
|-
|-
|Selling fake insurace for real money!
|HONK people!
|Just commit fraud! Do it! Tell them you have a great premium then run away once they pay!
|Hit people with your bike horn! Slip them then honk them! Top tier prank!
|They may want their money back when they realize <s>you fucked them</s> you pranked them.
|Some people will be so angry than you honked them they will attempt to kill you!
|-
|-
|wip
|Start a revolution!
|
|Try to overthrow Command and Security! Do it! The [[Site Manager]] and [[Head of Security]] will laugh their asses off as you <s>eat them</s> drag them to the guillotine!
|
|If you fail you will most definitely be executed!
|-
|Sell Fake Insurance!
|Insurance Fraud is hip and happening this season! Just pick a funny name like "Mog'hes Dental" and sell it to your crewmates! See how much you can rack up in fraudulent premiums!
|They may try to <s>demand a refund when they realize you fucked them</s> try to take your hard earned cash! But that's nothing a simple HONKing can't fix.
|-
|Attempt to Summon the Spirit of the Honkmother!
|Form a ritual in the chapel! Draw runes in crayon! Collect <s>garbage</s> precious artifacts to offer to the grand HONK. Perform <s>loud raucous yelling</s> incantations to appease the Honkmother and summon a vessel of her radiance! Hope to the grand <s>admins</s> spirits of the world that you may transcend to one of the grand honkers!
|Get sent to the Psychiatrist's office for intensive therapy. Incarceration for disturbing the piece. Getting stricken by lightning because you <s>prayed 35 times and annoyed an admin</s> made god angry.
|-
|Be funny!
|Do it! Be funny! It's not like anyone ever asked you about YOUR feelings on the matter. HONK. It's not like you're a normal person just like anyone else. *capgun noises* You're just a poor tortured soul wearing your heart on your greasepaint stained face mask. *rapid double horn squeezing*.
|No one is laughing...
|}
|}
<br />
<br />


{{Jobs}}
{{Jobs}}

Latest revision as of 17:39, 4 May 2021

This section or article is being updated. Certain details are subject to change. You can help this by contributing.


ENTERTAINMENT STAFF
Clown.png
Clown 		Access: Anywhere if you can find someone stupid enough to let you in Entertainment Backroom
Difficulty: HONK!
Supervisors: The Clowncellor Head of Personnel
Duties: Be "Funny"Funny Operating Procedure: Clown
Guides: Story: Clowns

Overview

Clowning is a prestigious art that requires an SCA years of studying and training at the Clown Planet Institute. Clowns are known for their Masks and funny hair, their dramatic red clothing, and their massive oversized shoes. They're lesser known for telling jokes, putting on plays, making a general fool of themselves, getting grievously injured, selling insurance, and pulling WaCkY pRaNkS! Some clowns are sad, some clowns are happy, some clowns are horny, but all clowns are supposed to be entertaining, even if they aren't always funny.

Clown Traditions

Clowns have traditional rituals passed down even outside of the Clown Planet Institute, that, while not confirmed by actual documented data, have been passed down by word of mouth. The clown, as per nonverbal agreement, is encouraged to act like they got in a shuttle accident to act in ways that would normally land an average crewmember in the Psychologist's office, or worse, a Security Officer's stomach the Brig. These include, but are not limited to: hiding your identity, refusing to ever take your mask off, being a shitty greytider who goes around collecting tools like its loot taking things you don't really need, using said tools to Hack into places that don't come with your job, and eating the CRO playing pranks on your fellow crewmembers. Common tools of the trade include: Banana Peels, Banana Cream Pies, your trusty Bike Horn, and whatever you can get your filthy grubby hands on whatever tools you find in maintenance along the way.


Classic Clown Pranks

Prank! Prank Description! Prank Consequences!
Lube in the hallway! Just lube up some tiles and watch em fly right into a gut into the koi pond! Banana peels are a good alternative if you run out of lube or the chemist has more than one braincell! Never put lube in front of an airlock or you will be banned security will never let you out of the brig.
HONK people! Hit people with your bike horn! Slip them then honk them! Top tier prank! Some people will be so angry than you honked them they will attempt to kill you!
Start a revolution! Try to overthrow Command and Security! Do it! The Site Manager and Head of Security will laugh their asses off as you eat them drag them to the guillotine! If you fail you will most definitely be executed!
Sell Fake Insurance! Insurance Fraud is hip and happening this season! Just pick a funny name like "Mog'hes Dental" and sell it to your crewmates! See how much you can rack up in fraudulent premiums! They may try to demand a refund when they realize you fucked them try to take your hard earned cash! But that's nothing a simple HONKing can't fix.
Attempt to Summon the Spirit of the Honkmother! Form a ritual in the chapel! Draw runes in crayon! Collect garbage precious artifacts to offer to the grand HONK. Perform loud raucous yelling incantations to appease the Honkmother and summon a vessel of her radiance! Hope to the grand admins spirits of the world that you may transcend to one of the grand honkers! Get sent to the Psychiatrist's office for intensive therapy. Incarceration for disturbing the piece. Getting stricken by lightning because you prayed 35 times and annoyed an admin made god angry.
Be funny! Do it! Be funny! It's not like anyone ever asked you about YOUR feelings on the matter. HONK. It's not like you're a normal person just like anyone else. *capgun noises* You're just a poor tortured soul wearing your heart on your greasepaint stained face mask. *rapid double horn squeezing*. No one is laughing...


Jobs on Vorestation

IconJobs.png

Command Site Manager, Head of Personnel, Head of Security, Chief Engineer, Research Director, Chief Medical Officer
Security Head of Security, Security Officer, Warden, Detective
Engineering Chief Engineer, Engineer, Atmospheric Technician
Cargo Quartermaster, Cargo Technician, Shaft Miner
Medical Chief Medical Officer, Medical Doctor, Paramedic, Psychologist, Chemist,
Science Research Director, Scientist, Roboticist, Xenobiologist
Service & Civilian Intern/Visitor, Bartender, Botanist, Chef, Chaplain, Command Secretary, Janitor, Librarian, Pilot
Station-Bound AI, Cyborg, Maintenance Drone, Personal AI, Ghost, Mouse
ITV Talon Talon Captain, Talon Pilot, Talon Guard, Talon Doctor, Talon Engineer
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