No Fun Allowed: Difference between revisions
No edit summary |
EinKleiner (talk | contribs) (Gateway is no more) |
||
Line 20: | Line 20: | ||
#Space OSHA must review all construction projects, and they'll be here some time in 2-3 weeks. | #Space OSHA must review all construction projects, and they'll be here some time in 2-3 weeks. | ||
#Xenobiology is banned from making slimes, because nothing good ever comes of it. | #Xenobiology is banned from making slimes, because nothing good ever comes of it. | ||
#Staff are not allowed to leave their workplaces and must send regular status reports to the [[Colony Director]], this is a professional business. | #Staff are not allowed to leave their workplaces and must send regular status reports to the [[Colony Director]], this is a professional business. | ||
#Breaks are not allowed unless you've been working steady for 4 hours, in which case, you're allowed a 30 minute meal break. Otherwise, get back to work. | #Breaks are not allowed unless you've been working steady for 4 hours, in which case, you're allowed a 30 minute meal break. Otherwise, get back to work. | ||
Line 28: | Line 27: | ||
#Ghosts are unrealistic, if you die you are banned. | #Ghosts are unrealistic, if you die you are banned. | ||
#Exploration is removed, no sane corporation would waste money on exploring. | #Exploration is removed, no sane corporation would waste money on exploring. | ||
#Anyone wanting to board the tram must | #Anyone wanting to board the tram must buy a ticket. | ||
[[Category:Joke pages]] | [[Category:Joke pages]] |
Revision as of 19:04, 4 May 2021
Sometimes, certain rules are really just guidelines. The purpose of Vorestation is to have fun, ideally with the intended purpose that's literally in the god damn title.
Some people think that's crazy talk, so this page is dedicated to people who would rather Vorestation (and in fact, every SS13 server) give an authentic experience with all the FUN™ of a real workplace, except with none of the pay. Here's what would help make Vorestation the cold and unfeeling hard-scifi corporate experience that you want, just like your normal day job, except in space.
Also, in case it isn't obvious, this is a joke page. Anyone who takes these suggestions seriously is a fucking idiot.
MOST BEST AUTHENTIC SPACEMEN EXPERIENCE™
These are helpful suggestions submitted by players and admins on how to create MOST BEST AUTHENTIC SPACEMEN EXPERIENCE™. If you hear a helpful suggestion, add it to this list.
- Cargo will now deny all of your orders without the proper paperwork being filled out. Also the box of hats is removed.
- Speaking of hats, Ian can no longer wear hats. That's animal abuse.
- Security Officers can't use unsanctioned means of transporting prisoners.
- Asset Protection is removed because no functional government would allow it to exist.
- The Emergency Response Team can only carry tasers and rubber bullets. Actually on second thought, they don't get weapons. They're basically firefighters and paramedics.
- Vore is unrealistic and therefore should be removed.
- Security has all lethal weapons removed. You're basically glorified mall cops, after all.
- In fact, just replace Security with a phone to call the space police.
- Engineers can't build anything without the explicit approval of the Chief Engineer, Colony Director, and Central Command.
- Space OSHA must review all construction projects, and they'll be here some time in 2-3 weeks.
- Xenobiology is banned from making slimes, because nothing good ever comes of it.
- Staff are not allowed to leave their workplaces and must send regular status reports to the Colony Director, this is a professional business.
- Breaks are not allowed unless you've been working steady for 4 hours, in which case, you're allowed a 30 minute meal break. Otherwise, get back to work.
- All AI laws must be reset immediately without even asking what they are, the instant the RD becomes aware of them.
- Anyone who does anything that so much as touches your job is breaking the rules. Even if it's also their job. Especially if it's also their job.
- People doing anything unrealistic in a closed room must be reported to the admins immediately, to protect the immersion of the ghost players.
- Ghosts are unrealistic, if you die you are banned.
- Exploration is removed, no sane corporation would waste money on exploring.
- Anyone wanting to board the tram must buy a ticket.