Job Guides

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Revision as of 16:57, 18 January 2018 by Burrito Justice (talk | contribs) (Noodle was re-added to the CE's office)
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Your Job is what NanoTrasen has assigned you to do aboard Virgo Orbital Research Establishment. It defines what equipment you start with, your ID card access, and what you're actually supposed to be doing.

Some useful links:

You should also read up about Corporate Regulations, so you know your rights, and Clone Memory Disorder if you happen to die and be cloned. Not doing so is considered very bad form for Roleplay.

Due to NanoTrasen equal rights laws, you might encounter some interesting new Species working alongside you.

Heads of Staff

Job Role Difficulty
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Colony Director
Oversee the Virgo Orbital Research Establishment and it's staff. Coordinate the heads of each department. Become a shining example of upholding SOP and Corporate Regulations. Use your translocator to warp straight into a sly predator's stomach to get around faster. Use your energy gun on hungry assistants grubs. Very Hard
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Head of Personnel
Be in charge of personnel and the service department. Reassign crew to jobs upon request. Never bother asking the head of a department before putting a psychopath in the job. Wonder where the Colony Director went. Rub the fact that you're the de facto second-in-command in everyone else's faces. Wonder why your holdout gun has so few shots well after it's too late. Hard
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Head of Security
Oversee your Security Officers and uphold Corporate Regulations or die trying. Bellybrig criminals without a second thought. Wear your cool voidsuit that looks about as imposing as the rest of your edgy wardrobe. Watch your prisoners disintegrate when the supermatter delams on the floor below. Order more ridiculous equipment for your already-gigantic armory. Soul Crushing
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Chief Engineer
Direct your Engineers. Get cool power tools and a sleek hardsuit. Berate the engine tech for using Nitrogen. Call out the lazy Atmospheric Tech for not optimizing Atmospherics. Fix disasters once your engineers rush to the dorms immediately after everything is setup. Get yelled at by the Colony Director when nothing is fixed within two minutes of something breaking. Have the best pet on the station. Hard
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Research Director
Attempt to direct the Research department. End up just counseling newer Scientists on where to find everything to max research levels. Prepare for the worst when Xenobiology mentions they have orange slimes. Watch Xenobotany go up in a cloud of smoke when they grow explosive corn. Witness an intern make an integrated circuit with the power of seven suns shoved inside. Wonder why no research has been conducted for four hours. Pet Kendrick. Medium
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Chief Medical Officer
Direct your soldiers in the warzone known as the Infirmary. Fill in for positions that other doctors do not know how to do. Accidentally donate all your blood restocking the resleever. Screech when an EMT sets cryo to 0 Kelvin. Frown furiously when the chemist renames KeloDerm to "Dermotane." Completely forget about medical records. Genuinely smile when you're thanked in an otherwise thankless job. Point to the "NO SMOKING" sign. Get eaten by Runtime for being a micro. Unrewarding

Law and Order

Job Role Difficulty
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Security Officer
Ask your boss what to do. Get told to patrol wherever. Frequent the bar because that's where all the filthy criminals hang out. Rush to an assault call and find out it's just two people in a scene. Listen as they berate you in LOOC. Bellybrig without looking at prefs. Get bwoinked. Get your stun gun disarmed and hide behind a window to use your taser. Accidentally let go of a suspect when you try handing them to the Warden. Hard
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Warden
Kick back and doze off in your office. Observe ERP crime from afar with your sick binoculars. Order a riding crop to abuse discipline prisoners. Shoot your shotgun at prisoners from the catwalks. Watch one prisoner eat another from the catwalks. Froth at the mouth when a virus blasts the brig. Leave handcuffs on your prisoners for kinky roleplay. Only timeskip vore offenses, everything else (resisting arrest, sparking a manhunt, etc) does not get timeskipped. Hard
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Detective
Swab everything. Scan everything. Analyze everything. Everything everything. Wave your gold holobadge around. Investigate a kidnapping. Get kidnapped yourself. Drink your sorrows away at the bar. Tip your hat. Lose your gun. Start an investigation into who stole your gun. Swab everything. Scan everything. Ad infinitum. Hard
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Internal Affairs Agent
Get summoned by pubbies that are accused of actual crimes more than people accused of crimes that genuinely deserve your attention. Sit in your office positioned on an eerily quiet floor. Put the internal in internal affairs when you get eaten. Send faxes to CC on rare occasion. Medium to Hard

Engineering

Job Role Difficulty
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Station Engineer
Ask the Chief Engineer if you can start the engine. Get denied. Try to keep track of all the ridiculous steps they take to optimize the setup. Consolidate the solar SMES coils. Flip tables once grubs show up thirty minutes into the shift. Try to understand the pipes in Atmos and get chased out by the baron of the land who wasn't doing anything before you showed up anyway. Realize there's nothing left to do and disasters only happen when you go to the dorms. Medium
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Atmospheric Technician
Fix pipes. Place pipes. If people are telling you that you're useless, then you probably haven't failed at your job yet, and people are breathing safely. Max all the pumps. Unclog the algae generators. Cry when superheated Phoron comes tunneling down the scrubber pipes when you haven't even bothered setting up the purge valves. Medium

Cargo and Supply

Job Role Difficulty
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Quartermaster
Pretend to be a head of staff. Listen to the Head of Personnel anyway because you have to. Uphold bureaucracy and paperwork. Watch people just scribble silly words on a piece of paper asking for crayons to chew on anyway. Order carpet and foam swords and knight assistants into your kingdom. Secretly wish you could open those fancy security crates. Medium
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Cargo Technician
Push crates. Almost get sold by your boss on account of how useless you are. Send empty implanters back to medical and screech that they can be refilled. Get ignored because no one cares. Watch idiots fly onto the conveyor with every bone broken and four different instances of internal bleeding. Eat them. Easy
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Shaft Miner
Ask for a mining mech. Get ignored and mine with your bare hands drill and satchel. Accidentally destroy an artifact and get assblasted with radiation. Die alone and cold because you're out of sensors range. Throw your hands up in the air when you find diamonds. Get yelled at by Research when there aren't enough diamonds. Never get thanked for your efforts. Easy

Medical

Job Role Difficulty
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Medical Doctor
Hawk over suit sensors. Ask people to turn around for implants. Continue waiting until they do. Slam dunk people into the body scanner. Operate on all of a patient's limbs at the same time. Use opiates willy-nilly. Fold scan reports into paper airplanes. Ask for ridiculous custom medicine mixes. Wordlessly inject/shove pills into someone's mouth when they ask for treatment. Shake your fist at the patient's right to refuse treatment. Scene in the infirmary instead of the dorms because something is bound to happen sooner or later. Underappreciated
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Paramedic
Sprint out the door at the first mention of injury. Sigh when no one tells their position and only screams for help. Toss people onto your roller bed and stabilize their critical injuries. Realize you don't have medkits Laugh because you have a belt full of bottles of medicine. Realize you don't have access Laugh because you brought the Hardsuit and can gain access to pretty much anywhere someone is injured. Exhausting
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Psychologist
Genuinely listen to the crew's problems. Assist them in identifying the underlying issues and how to overcome them. Conduct different types of therapies. Get a cool, roomy office which is basically a bigger dorm room to do lewd stuff. Mind Bending
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Chemist
Push buttons on the chemical dispenser. Find yourself unable to recall the recipes for medicines but do them anyway because it's all muscle memory at this point. Stock the h*ck out of the fridge with medicine that most doctors will probably just overlook. Ask mining for Phoron sheets for fun slime reactions. Make pills sometimes. Act surprised when someone actually comes in with a prescription. Monotonous

Research

Job Role Difficulty
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Scientist
Put things in an analyzer and watch numbers go up on a console. Rush research levels within minutes. Nag mining for diamonds. Make upgraded machine parts for departments. Shoot fuel rods at high velocity just because you can. Singe your eyebrows off. Fall over the railing. Medium
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Roboticist
Make robits that go beep boop. Unleash an army of cleanbots that all give up and get lost sooner or later. Accidentally turn on the farmbot's setting to harvest and stare in awe when hydroponics is filled to the brim with plants. Build cool stompy mechs. Look suspicious when you ask security for a helmet and baton to build securitrons. Repair synthetic crew on occasion. Easy
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Xenobiologist
Breed gooey slimes. Love the slimes. Watch when one slime decides to bully another because their color is different. Teach them speech. Accidentally put an amber with other slimes and get overrun with constantly repopulating slimes. Get your DNA digested. Medium

Service and Civilian

Job Role Difficulty
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Assistant
Run around without a job and be lazy. Get eaten. Backseat professionals and tell them how to do their job. Get eaten. Get implanted and cryo right after. Get eaten. Get eaten. Get eaten Very Easy
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Bartender
Mix drinks. Line the table with alcohol that will probably vaporize someone's liver. Build a sick web nest in your back room Complain because web nests were removed due to abuse. Wave your shotgun around. Shoot rowdy customers with your shotgun. Get arrested. Easy
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Botanist
Ask the Chef what they need for ingredients for their cooking. Don't get a reply and grow Ambroisa Deus potatoes. Find the chef missing and do all of the cooking yourself. Construct an apiary for bees! Toss mutagen into the tomato tray and get eaten by an angry tomato. Easy
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Chef
Manage Botany and the Kitchen simultaneously since no one likes going Botanist because who likes eating vegetables? Make a menu. Lay utensils out on the table. Stick around and take orders from the crew. Cook all of the meat in the fridge into meat steaks, toss it all onto the tabletop, and run to the dorms to scene. You careless monster. Easy
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Chaplain
Make Pastafarianism as your religion and praise the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Get patrons asking if said deity has meatballs. Reply yes and get millions of fanatics that secretly only want to eat the deity, and you by extension. Wave your useless null rod around. Sit bored in your chapel because no one ever visits it. Easy
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Command Secretary
Be an assistant but with a suit, briefcase, and bridge access. Keep the Guide to Paperwork open in a window and pretend you know what you're doing. Get lewded by the command staff. Easy
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Janitor
Lead a losing battle against station filth. Regret taking the job when you come across the dorms. Never visit the top floor and allow it to get unreasonably dirty. Place signs. Point to your signs. Get sat on. Easy
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Librarian
Keep the library shelves stocked. Ignore that and only fill the adult shelves. Create your own newscaster channel that no one will ever check. Host games of dare dice which usually just amounts to everyone getting eaten. Write steamy fan fiction about two crew members. Easy

Station-Bound

Job Role Difficulty
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AI
Be the station. Serve the crew. Or don't. Bolt doors. Electrify doors. Obey orders or get banned. Hope for the Ion storm to hit really good. Get so many laws uploaded you can't even roleplay them all. Search for legal loopholes in your lawset. Be a ghetto all-access dealer to the crew. Extremely Hard
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Cyborg
Follow your laws and do your job. Troll people as a janiborg by running them over with your scrubbers. Medium to Hard
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Maintenance Drone
Fix, clean, and improve the station. Follow only your laws. Ignore everyone else beside other drones. <- SEE THAT SHIT? THAT MEANS THAT YOU GET TO IGNORE PEOPLE DYING IN SPACE. Troll around and construct/deconstruct everything you see fit because you are "improving the station". Medium to Hard
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Personal AI
Be someone's constant companion. Act as a translator. Have one of the most fun tandem roleplays there are. Follow your user's directions and have a pretty wacky personality. Hack doors with the AI's permission. Act as an IC internet-serching engine and allow people to watch porn without headphones learn new facts about the station. Very Easy
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Ghost
Observe the round. Bother admins to revive you. Bother geneticists to clone you. Metagame. Ask admins to end the round because you died. Stalk ERP. Stalk high quality ERP. Stalk normal RP. Whine in OOC chat. Whine in Ghost chat. Close the game. None
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Mouse
Observe the round and squeak. Piss off the chef. Actually act like a mouse. Die all the time. Whine to the admin that you got lolstomped by a Tajaran. Make the admins fight about whether or not they should give a shit about mouse players. Very Easy to Medium

Events

These roles only appear during events. Some of them are antagonists, some of them are just visitors. Either way they only appear during events, and you cannot play them even with a whitelist.

Job Role Difficulty
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Mercenary
Get paid to look after the interests of your wealthy employer. Mostly look after yourself. Very Hard
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Cultist
Sing praises to Devoratrix Mundi, the Redspace Deity of Devouring. Decorate your trophy rack with eyeballs. Sow panic and glorify in the cold darkness of the void as you crush the station in the bowels of your Lord. Sometimes inside actual bowels. Very Hard
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Pirate
Plunder booty from th' station! Capture thar crew in yer belly! Very Hard
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Changeling
Be friendly, polite, and have a plan to consume everyone you meet. Revel in paranoia, panic, and terror as you turn good men and women on their own loved ones. Walk right into the Armory wearing the Warden's face. Hard
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Xenomorph
Grow. Eat. Spread. Repopulate. Maul xenophiles. Hard
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Technomancer
Sort of like a Space Wizard you may have seen in the movies, only REAL. PROBABLY. Hard
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Cortical Borer
Spread, thrive, and grow in the hostile human world. Crawl into peoples' ears and whisper sweet, violent nothings. Create pandemonium as your glorious breeding ground bloats in size. Hard
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Space Ninja
Uphold the ways of Bushido. Walk boldly through forbidden halls, and sever the hands of any man who would dare challenge you. Drink the station's power as surely as steel swallows lightning. Vanish into the shadows and emerge with your blade at their throats. Or make them vanish. Into your stomach. Medium / Hard

Special

These jobs either require a whitelist, or only appear under special circumstances. An admin is not needed to spawn these roles.

Job Role Difficulty
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CentCom Officer
Act on behalf of CentCom. Avoid interfering unless absolutely necessary. Seriously, let them handle their own god damn problems and just fire whoever's responsible if they survive the disaster they caused. ERP in your private CentCom office. Slowly go insane as you serve as an in-character form of admin. Soul Crushing
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Emergency Response Team
Deal with the Red Alert. Join the crew in the stomach of what caused it. Medium / Hard
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Clown
Honk! Play harmless pranks and hope you don't get your chest caved in! Honk! Nag the HoP for an all-access pass. Honk! Nag robotics for a H.O.N.K. Mech. Honk! Use both tools to break into the Director's office and HONK in his face. HONK! HONK!
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Mime
*wave ...
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Trader
Sell copious amounts of dangerous contraband to the crew. Laugh in Security's face as they legally can't stop you. Laugh at people who step off your ship and immediately get arrested for bringing contraband aboard the station. Laugh as the crew has a mass shooting with all the guns you just sold them. Laugh. Laugh all the way to the bank. Easy / Medium
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Courier
Deliver and retrieve contraband on behalf of NanoTrasen or other companies. Have legal permission to handle dangerous contraband. Abuse said permission maliciously. Scare Security who don't know you're not an antag. Easy / Hard
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Deathsquad
Asset Protection
Get overpowered weapons and armor, then murder the ever-living fuck out of whatever CentCom told you to; usually attempted mutinies. Cause a lot of collateral damage in the process. Be an asshole to the crew for making you come here. Be an instrument of flagrant admin abuse. Robust